Hitchhiker's Guide to the SLverse

RL Download Patch 1.1 ("Irony")

2010-04-30T07:35:00.000-07:00

Thought this would amuse the Guide readers.

As soon as I submitted the entry on Height in SL and was approving the submission, Google had an advertisement for Growth enhancements in its ad window...

Pretty sure it was about height and not about other...ahem...dimensions.

Anyway, I thought it was good bit of irony in the morning. Or maybe I am Alanis Morrisette and have no clue what Irony really is, but am using it in a way that displays no actually irony.

Which is ironic in itself.

Irony is funny that way.

Stay Hoopy!

Terms-----> Height ("Tall Things Considered")

2010-04-30T06:38:00.000-07:00

Einstein declared in the first half of the 20th Century that Time is Relative, and the same is true in SL (see Time). But a relativism that has spilled over into our SLverse is Height, resulting in the average height of its citizens being in the realm between 5'11" and 7'. And trust us when we say that 5'11" is the real short end of the stick.

Many have pondered how we wanderers of the Grid have become the victims of such Gigantism. It is generally thought that some Darwinian drive in everyone kept us edging our avi's height up in an attempt to at least look each other in the eye. And when we finally hit our maximum heights, we began to invest in shoes with platform bases to give us an extra edge. Builders, in an attempt to meet the need of the literal ever-growing population, raised the doors and roofs--also literal--to accommodate. And to prevent the average SLer from bumping their virtual noggin on a virtual door jam.

The population kept growing and so did the buildings. Those who tried to stick to their average 5'8" to 5'10" height began to get accused of playing underage avatars. An entire section of the population rebelled and created the Tinies. And eventually the SLverse settled into a grid populated by Brobdignagians and Lilliputians, with the occassional Gulliver running around feeling just a bit off.

For those hikers of the hitch who have become part of the evolutionary rise in height, it is best to note that not all builders have built their sims for the height boom. The Great Wall of China, for one, is an awesome place to take in and enjoy (See Great Wall of China). But if you try to walk its walls, be sure to lower yourself to a respectable 5'10" if you want to get through the doorways.

And even then, make sure that you have low heeled shoes on.

Terms -----> Alts

2010-04-27T09:46:00.000-07:00

The SLverse is a vast place with many people to meet. Many, many people. So many shapes and sizes, so many names and backgrounds. And there are so many places to meet them... dance clubs, virtual seminars and meet and greets, Roleplay sims, and various adult themed locations for the more...ahem...discerning citizen. There are even social websites designed for SL citizens.

But the question any new SL hiker of the hitch must ask themselves when they meet another of the wide wonderful wanderers of the SLverse is... "Haven't I met you already before?"

You see, on occassion, you could be indeed meeting someone you have already met before in the form of an Alt. An Alt is, simply put, an Alternative Avatar used by a RL user to... well, there are a wide range of reasons for using an Alt. The now defunct SL mega-corporation Alternative Industries used to market its Alt Creation Department as... "Not happy with how you started your Second Life? Well, how about a Third, or even a Fourth?"

It has been surmised that people create Alts to restart their Second Life. For some reason, or reasons, they are not happy with how their Second Life turned out. So, they simply set up a new SL citizen, transfer what can be transferred from their old SL citizen, and then say good-bye to the old and hello to the new. Some SLer's call this 'rebooting'.

Others create Alts to play in Roleplay sims in the SLverse. It is considered highly efficient use of inventory as all of your roleplay clothing and items don't have to be massively foldered. It is also convenient for SL roleplayers as it allows them to comfortably roleplay a jerk and then retire to their Dr. Jeckyll side when surrounded by their non-roleplaying friends.

There are multiple and varied other uses for Alts that take a little darker twist. A few examples:

Creating an alt allows you, if you are crafty enough, to perform a little detective work and see how you are being talked about by your friends
Don't feel you are getting enough SL loving? Create an alt and partake in a wide range of SL delights.
Feel a little like an outcast cause your friends hate Fashion Hunts, but you secretly live for them? Create an alt and search for those little symbols to your heart's delight in the safe knowledge that you can log back in as your other self and make fun of those hunters with your friends and no one will know the wiser.

It is highly recommended that if you attempt to use an Alt for the purposes of eluding or deceiving your SL social circle, that you take great pains to change your texting habits and keep any or all of your personal likes and dislikes separate from your main. Also, it is highly recommended that you change your look considerably. Your friends and family have gotten used to you, your idioms, and your flex prim hair and can see those things.

It is possible to log in as both yourself and your alt at the same time. And while this is great practice for the field of undercover internet surveillance, it is a practice that could easily implode with a mistell in the wrong chat box or internet connection loss. It is also highly recommended to keep your main and your alt in separate locations as it is rumored that appearing in the same sim at the same time would have the effects to the SL time/space continuum described by the Doc in Back to the Future II. Think of it like crossing the streams in Ghostbusters.

Terms -----> Tiny Avatars ("I don't think we are in Brobdingnag anymore")

2009-12-18T16:14:00.000-08:00

(The Guide welcomes new contributor, Tane Daxter, to the staff. This is his first entry.)

Spoiler: This entry uses the word "cute" 17 times.

There are many different types of avatars in Second Life. Most of us find a good skin and shape and hair, and add different items of clothing in an attempt to look human. Some avatars look like elves, or dragons or mermaids. One of the most interesting, and cutest, avatars are tiny avatars.

Tiny avatars, or tinies, are cute little creatures: usually kneehigh to a grasshopper. Tiny avatars come with all the prim attachments to turn your avatar into a cute little creature, plus a special shape which folds your avatar into the tiny shape. There are cute cats, cute dogs, cute dragons, and even cute little robots.

Tinies can do almost everything a standard avatar can do: walk, dance, gestures, etc. However, you need special tiny dances to do cute little dances. Fortunately, there are a slew of cute tiny dances available, plus a cute tiny dance ball.

There's also tons of cute furniture and cute dances and cute treehouses to explore. Once you get a cute little tiny at the Extrovirtual sim, you can choose from cute clothing, dresses, shoes, witches outfits, ball gowns and more at the various stores at Raglan Shire sim.

Tinies were once considered a fad. But they quickly caught on with a role-playing crowd and now Raglan Shire is one of the most unique communities in Second Life. It is well worth picking up one of these cute little tiny avatars and going to your favourite club. They are guaranted head turner and you'll get a lot of attention!!

People -----> Rylan Sirnah

2009-12-11T09:07:00.000-08:00

Subject: Rylan Sirnah

Rez Date: 9/19/2009

Occupation: Officially Lead Dancer at Uthoriea... Unofficially, skills and talents put to all sorts of use.

Builder and scripter
Tardis mechanic and operator
Keeper of many good secret places to show off to those who are worthy

Aliases: The Tom

Other Info:
Rylan Sirnah is a cool cat (ears and tail included). He hails from the colder north "where the women are strong, the men are good looking and all of the children are above average." One look at his RL pic in profile proves this comment.

He is a devoted friend who holds his relationships with those he meets in SL dear. If he calls you Kitteh, you are very dear, indeed.

His dedication to building and scripting has ensured that he holds the Guide Golden Thumb award for making an entrance or an exit. Just make sure that you are not fully perved in on him when he does this. The recovery time from the flash blindness can last from 1 day to a week, depending which method of departure/arrival he opts to use.

Caring, dedicated, energetic, hot-talker, great, funny, outgoing, kind, and HOT have all been words to describe Rylan. So, if a Tardis materializes next to you, while travelling, and a man with piercing eyes and a swishing tail steps out and asks you if you would like to go on a little trip? Definitely say yes.

As a Hitchhiker, you could ask for no better tour guide.

Terms ----> TMI

2009-12-10T11:32:00.000-08:00

TMI is simply a quick way of saying too much information.***

***The editors of the Guide have truncated this entry as it had too many personal details about the writer that they felt went beyond the reader's need to really know. The above passage is all that remained.

Terms -----> AFK

2009-12-08T09:37:00.000-08:00

(To Tane Daxter! Thank you for the great idea last night!)

AFK stands for Away From Keyboard.

It is a quick way to tell your friends and local chat compadres that you need to step away for a second. A more impersonal version of BRB (be right back), AFK purposely keeps your reasoning vague for why you are stepping way. You could be on a phone call, pouring yourself a glass of water, relieving yourself of a glass of water, or decide it is time to streak the neighborhood again. AFK will cover all of that in three simple letters.

A simple word of warning... It is not a good idea to start your name with the letters AFK.

Back in the SL middle ages of 2006, a young man chose the name AF Kronos to honor both the Air Force and his love for Greek Titans. He was a very popular avatar in SL at the time. Then due to every SLer's need to truncate names to save themselves from carpel tunnel, he got the nickname AFK. This soon proved very problematic when he teleported into a sim wide event. Everyone saw him, and in complete Cheers fashion started shouting "AFK!" The sim grew then very quiet as it was then assumed by all that everyone else has stepped away from the keyboard. People got bored from the lack of chat, and the event petered out. AF Kronos quickly realized the quiet carnage he had created and set about creating a new avatar the next day.

Places -----> Innsmouth ("Cthul-me? Yeah, well Cthulhu!")

2009-11-24T15:26:00.000-08:00

You might consider yourself a true traveler of the SL wastelands. An avatar that has borne the brunt of zombie hordes and Gorean torture methods. Or you might have even been so brave as to endure a DJ set devoted entirely to the works of Celine Dion. But nothing, oh nothing, my hiker of the hitch, can prepare you for the mouth-dropping awe and soul-creeping terror that Innsmouth has in store for you.

If you are a fan of H.P. Lovecraft, or have read or heard of some of his books, you know that his work dealt with the rational mind fracturing at the concept of a truly alien and incomprehensible universe that lurks just beneath the thin layer of what we have set up as "reality". Confusing to follow at times? Maybe. Disturbing to the core? Oh Frack, yes!

Well, Innsmouth, owned by Joyous Parkinwith and built with amazing talent and imagination by Darmin Darkes and BaileyMarie Princess, is literally a sim out of a psychological night terror. Is there shopping? No, because the stores are all closed and the shopkeepers are gone, eventhough something lurks in the shadows beyond the display windows. Is there any place to catch a show? No, unless you want to explore the dilapidated Opera House where sometimes you hear faint sounds of ghostly arias of the past, and sometimes you just hear the sound of a creaking of floorboards somewhere near. How about dancing? No, but you can check out the old movie house where the movie running is of a flickering couple dancing over and over again in the yellowed dim cast of the projector.

No, my daring adventurer, this place is for you to explore. Beautifully designed and laid out for you to feel like you are in search of clues to a mystery of which you know nothing. You are provided with a welcome card at your entry point which gives you the fictional background of Innsmouth and some basic guidelines. Basically, the sim is designed to be a tourist terror trap. It is not adverse to RP from visiting avatars. But its main goal is to provide sim-explorers a place to take a walk on the true wild side and explore a tidy 1930s New England town that somehow slipped off of the continental shelf of reality into the abyss.

If you have a Windlight Viewer, it is suggested to use the Gelatto environment preset. If you are on Emerald, it is suggested to use the [EUPHORIA] fin de siecle or [TOR] HORROR - Dawnbreaker environment settings. Trust us when we say to trust them, you will not be disappointed.

A major Golden Thumb award to Luxe Helendale for bringing the Guide onto this place!

Terms -----> Lag

2009-11-18T15:01:00.000-08:00

That electronic encyclopaedia, otherwise known as Wiki, starts off trying to explain lag by discussing such terms as latency and packets of data and speed of light in vaccum. And then it settles down a bit and starts speaking in terms that most people can understand, and finally states...

"While strictly every packet experiences lag, the term lag is used to refer to delays noticeable to the user."

In other words, if your screen is looking like a bad slide show, or it takes forever for the letter you just typed to show up in the chat window, or you are standing around bald in a place you just rezzed when you should be showing off that shagarrific do you just dropped 500 linden for, you are experiencing lag.

Most SLers tend to be almost resigned to lag. This is mostly because it takes forever to type out their fury at the time of the lag. By the time they can correctly spell the words "f**cking hell!", they have already moved on, celebrated their next Rez day, met the love of their life, got partnered, got divorced, went through a period of rebound, went through a period of abstinent personal reflection, and finally logged off.

As a matter of fact, Lag in SL tends to be almost treated with a ironic twinkle as demonstrated by the following exchange

"How was the party at the club last night?"
"It was lagtastic!"

As a general rule of thumb, the more avatars you have hanging out in one space, the more lagtastic it is going to be. Here are some preventative suggestions if you are planning a night out in an avi packed sim:

Remove all of your HUDs. C'mon, you don't need your AO cause you are probably going to be dancing anyway. And you definitely don't need your Xcite or other naughty HUDs. So, just remove them. AND...
Remove all of your bling. OK, seriously, if you think that having a laser light show surrounding you is the only way you are going to get attention, then you have definitely lost that loving feeling with your look. Go to MADesigns and get a new one.

If lag should occur--and it will, cause like being green in RL, everyone thinks they can be the exception and ignore the above two rules--Don't Panic! Most likely everyone else is experiencing the same thing. Follow these rules and you might make it out without crashing:

Start by following the preventative steps mentioned earlier. You don't think we actually thought you would follow them, did you?
Take your time writing, and don't get frustrated by it. If you missed that perfect opportunity to display your wit, just remember it would have been buried in all of the gesture spamming of wolf howls and HOOOO!!!'s anyway.
Go Busy. This will keep IM chatting to a minimum from groups and others who aren't there with you. And you suddenly look really important. OR...
TP the hell out! If you were only there for the music anyway, get the stream info and enjoy it from the safe confines of a sim wasteland somewhere.

Places -----> Kiku Gallery

2009-11-15T11:50:00.000-08:00

Years ago in RL, Kati Palen aspired to become a gallery owner or museum curator, and earned a MA degree in Art History toward that end. As it happened, her RL took a different direction and she ended up in another field. Then she entered the wonderful verse of SL, and took up a role playing an Edo-period geisha at Amatsu Shima. Soon, an opportunity to take the role of art curator at Amatsu was presented to her, and she gladly took the job, renamed the gallery, and planned her first show.

Kiku Gallery was born, a beautiful store front modern art gallery in Amatsu Shima.
Curating six shows since that day, it is Kati's mission to promote talented artists in Second Life, and help support them in a small way with proceeds from art sales--with a particular interest in promoting real life artists. One of her greatest personal bests was a retrospective of watercolors by her grandmother spanning from 1930 to today. Well attended and many works sold, Kiku Gallery then became accepted in the Second Life Showcase.

Kiku Gallery is only one of many interesting sights at Amatsu Shima. Visitors are encouraged to explore the island and take in all the lovely sights. Additionally, Amatsu Shima offers classes and workshops in poetry, literature, etc. There is a board outside the library, listing upcoming events.

Live performances are occassionally showcased at the gallery openings. One artist told a story in voice, choreographed with a slide show of his work. The Kiku Gallery is always continuing to explore how to incorporate live performace at openings, as well as investigate developing a program of events associated with the gallery.

Kati's work at Kiku Gallery is a true labor of love. And Kiku Gallery shows are the result of it's love of ideas and art.

RL Download Patch 1.0.6 ("Meh")

2009-11-11T14:28:00.000-08:00

To the person who clicked Meh on my entry...

THANK YOU!!!!

I encourage everyone to speak their piece here at the Guide. Whether it be to check off the reactions at the bottom of each entry or send a comment, I really do appreciate all of the feedback, good or bad.

Until our next entries on the Kiku Art Gallery and Moona Laval... Stay Hoopy!!!

People ------> Chaz Longstaff

2009-11-08T14:03:00.000-08:00

Chaz Longstaff came onto SL on Canadian Thanksgiving weekend in 2006. He says that he heard about SL and decided to try it to escape a TV documentary about Canadian wildlife. The Guide is trying to verify this story as this tends to be exactly why everyone else says they have joined SL. Also, like everyone else, he came for 5 minutes. Just 5, he says. Riiiiight.

By December of that year, he got the idea for Animated Living cushions and mats. He began learning scripting and the tool called "MLP" and opened his first store in Manhunt Mall and had his first sale in SL there on 4th March 2007. Business took off for him right away. However, in what he was to find is the regular occurence with landlords, he woke up one morning in the following April to find his entire store returned to him in one big lump object. So he packed up his wares and relocated to Vancouver Mall and has been there since.

But Chaz is a true entrepreneur on SL and one business was not enough. So, he expanded his business and It's a Wrap, his gift box and greeting card store, opened in July of 2007. This was followed by Fifth Avenue Elevators which opened in December 2007. And then by Blue Balls which opened in September 2008. And Closet Queen storage systems opened in July 2009.

Two months later, he would move into the dangerous and adventursome world of SL real estate when he and his business partner Duke Magneto bought Vancouver Island mall sim, and soon found themselves the landlords of 70 outlets. At the same time, he also rallied the residents's association for where he lives to save some of the area's core sims during the Homestead Sim crisis.

When asked about one his greatest creations he says to the Guide, "Doing the elevators was both grueling and fun. I developed them with Duke, who was relentless at testing them. One coding slip by me and the elevator with him in it would go rocketing up to the stratosphere, with Duke not seen again for days; or he'd go plummeting to his death shrieking." Sightings of Duke Magneto soaring across the skies of many sims like a fireball continue to this day.

Chaz's partner in SL is Kip Ashbourne. They live in the Cascadia area where they enjoy their community of neighbors, getting together regularly for events and holidays. The first thing Kip did when he moved in was drag all of Chaz's furniture into a pile in one corner and asked if he wanted to keep any of it. Chaz answered, "um, no?" This appeared to be the correct answer. Kip has become Chaz's business partner as well. They truly enjoy all of the time they spend together with Chaz creating and Kip looking after the quality control and customer service. They got married in Ciel Cathedral -- stunning huge place with massive bells, zero lag, and highly recommended by them.

Chaz and his close friends keep very busy. However, Chaz is also one of the hoopiest froods around! Always there if he can help, always friendly and amiable, if you run into this well-known, and well-respected SL businessman and citizen, count yourself extremely lucky to have met him. Just a couple of small things to note:

Don't shoot him a blind TP... he growls.
Kip is in charge.
Oh, and he diligently keeps his inventory under 900. When it goes over he starts to hyperventilate. So ask before you give him something... or be ready to have your SL CPR knowledge at the ready.

Places -----> MADesigns

2009-11-08T12:31:00.000-08:00

For the new SLer, many questions abound. What can I do? Where can I go? Why is this person running into me over and over again? And...

Why do I look like an evilly possessed action figure?

For the lucky few new SL citizens, more experienced angels cross their paths, and attempt to help them answer some of those questions. But, the really cool angels take our wide-eyed, helmet haired young SLer to MADesigns.

MADesigns specializes in getting that look just right. Or at least setting you on the path to finding that look that shows your true inner beauty. Each look offered is essentially just a shape with a designer card to show you where to go to get all of the details to make you look like the very attractive person in the card. For those who are new and have the Lindens to support it, following the instructions to the detail is important for no other reason than to show you how to set up new features for your avi. They also have hair, eyes, and other parts to enhance your look.

For those who are more adventurous, they see the possibilities available to them at each new store that MADesigns has opened their eyes to. And as this roving reporter has learned, experimentation is key. Looking just like one of the extremely beautiful men and women displayed on MADesigns walls is very tempting. But, if everyone did it, we would all look like we were all from the same gene pool. So, here is what we at the Guide suggests...

Find the one look on MADesigns walls that you feel best captures the new "inner" you.
Try the demo shape first to see if this is what work for you.
If the shape isn't quite what you like, rinse and repeat to step 1.
If you do like it, drop the money for the shape. If you have an angel helping you out, this will not be a problem. If not, then work on getting those Lindens, then rinse and repeat to step 1.
Once you have your purchased copied to your inventory, then open the styling notecard and start to explore the stores listed.
Find the item listed at each location, but take the time to demo options. This is your new "inner" you, after all. (and if you are new, you are gonna be on a tight budget, so make each purchase count!)
Don't panic! If you don't like the exact look, there are other options out there. The most important thing is that you no longer have the evil-possessed mannequin look. You should be rejoicing actually.
Wait two months for you "inner" you to rebel and decide that this isn't how you want to look now. Then rinse and repeat step 1.

RL Download Patch 1.0.5a

2009-10-20T08:07:00.000-07:00

Life has been really hectic this week for our Guide reporter, but just had to mention another great coincidence that just put a smile on my face.

In my previous RL Download Patch, I mentioned that I thought it would be great for a Queen Rock Band. Well, there is a Queen download available for Rock Band now!!! When I finally get a breather--have a looming deadline for a new writing gig, a Rez Day party to finish help coordinating, and a Going Away party to plan for my travelling companion Garrik Howley--I am gonna crank up the volume and grab that bass guitar. I will leave it to my friend, Travis, to attempt sounding like Freddie Mercury. I would have to undergo a painful surgery to be able to sing like that.

So, keep hitchhiking! The Guide will be back for you soon! I promise!

RL Download Patch 1.0.5 (Elliptical Thoughts)

2009-10-16T13:17:00.000-07:00

(OK, fair warning! This one is a doooozy of a long one.)

Today was a big day. I did my first 8 minute mile on the elliptical and not once did the machine scream at me to slow down the entire time I was on it. And after the 1.42 seconds of celebration passed, my mind immediately went, "Well, that's great! Now what?"

That's the danger for me when it comes to working out. I am both a creature of habit and a curious mind. So when I am working out and my body has gone into its continual motion, my mind is left as a battlefield between my OCD and my ADD.

For example, the iPod playlist that I have talked about in the 1.0.1 Download Patch. I have played that list so many times now in my quest for a better body that is has become my dearest friend. I tried creating a new playlist just for a change up, but found that I could never get in the groove. Suddenly, my cardio was off, or I couldn't get in the right position to do my crunches, it seemed. Or weights that had been challenging, suddenly became too heavy for me to keep up my reps. So, I changed back to my sure-fire friend of a playlist and all was well. My mind didn't like the change up.

But... like that dear friend that you love cause of all of the great history and you despise cause all they want to do is relive all of that great history, my iPod playlist has become predictable. So, another problem has set in. I find myself look at the timer and the clock more and more. I count my crunches and reps, and each number seems to have a weight that is more challenging than the task at hand. I have become, sad to say, bored with my iPod playlist.

Which brings me back to the 8 minute mile. I have been creeping closer and closer to it over the past couple of weeks. And last week, I got a mile in 8:15 and was able to keep that damned machine from being a cardio traffic cop, telling me to slow down. Suddenly, I had a new game. Something to keep me occupied while I listened to my comforting and droning old friend. And for the past 5 days, my workout was fun again. Even after the cardio was over, I was still thinking on how close I was getting to my goal, my own private 10,000 point Dow Jones Industrial Index, and what I could do to improve it.

So, today. I get 1.00 miles in 7:58 minutes, and the fireworks went off in my head. Coldplay had just ended and Blitzen Trapper was coming up. Furr is such an awesome song and fit so perfectly with my endorphin filled triumph. But as my mind made the turn into the third verse, that overwhelming sense of over-familiarity began to sink in again, and I swear I heard a little voice in my head cry out, "Awww, man... So what are we neurons going to do now for the next 22 minutes?"

I needed a game, and I need one fast. And one came to me as Furr ended, and Spoon's "The Underdog" took over. I would try to let my mind wander with each song. Go whereever it wanted to go. But, I would also try to keep my mind alert enough to capture some of its ramblings. And the SLverse was to be the playground for my thoughts to go playing about in. In some cases, I succeeded. Some cases, my mind drifted too far off for me to remember where it went. But the following is a smattering, by song playing at the time:

The Underdog--I gotta start trying Rocky's method of exploring SL. Open the map, click on a place and just teleport. Just start recording what I see there as places, instead of just finding the "right" place to write about. Hmm... What if I tp into someone's home? And they are there? And they are with someone?

The Way We Get By--Kip and Chaz are way too cool not too write about. But they each deserve their own entry. Plus the Blue Balls entry. I could write tomes on them. Wonder if Kip does logo design work. Can't wait to see what he does with that Rez Day party invitation. Wonder if they would mind if I came along on one of their hops around the grid sometime.

Pressure--Now Queen would be great to try on Rock Band. The vocals would probably be a bitch. But, I can't sing anyways. Bass is tough enough. Hey! Wonder if any SL programmer is thinking along the lines of something like that. Naw, part of the fun is in holding the instruments... But maybe the flipside fun would be in the Avi control. Hmm... Wonder if there is a Blue Ball for Rock Band posing.

Worry About You--Stephen King would have really been a good theme for that Rez Day party. Would so have come as Mother Abigail. But Grimm Fairy Tales is probably best. More guaranteed to be known. And I can dress up as a sexy Hunter.

Hurt--Aw man... Gor by Twilight! That would be have been a good name for a Gorean/Vampire theme! Crap... Too late to change. Kip would kill me.

All Star--I need to find time to talk to Eddi about the article for VR Style. Gotta give him time to shoot the places. It really is cool how all of the owners are so open and willing to talk about their sims. And some of the ideas behind them are great. The Guide definitely has to get entries on them. But VR Style first.

Disturbia--Seriously, do you think like you will ever really look like Bren? If we all looked like our Avis, none of us would be on SL anyways. Ok, ok, five more.

Stronger--I miss Zakari. I am gonna write him a hello tonight. There are so many people that I haven't hung out with in some time. OK, entry about Zakari, definitely. And then...

The iPod stopped. My game was done. And it was time to get back to work.

Terms -----> Rez Day

2009-10-14T14:32:00.000-07:00

A Rez Day, simply put, is the day an SLer first logged into SL. It is your avi's day of "birth".

Many SLer's life expectancies are relatively short as the ratio of time in SL to RL is about as comparable as the currency ratio of Lindens to dollars. So many avis don't live to see their first Rez Day.

For those SLer's with longer life expectancy, the Rez Day is, in some cases, more hallowed than any other major holiday. With perhaps the exception of Cinco De Mayo--hardcore SLer's like to have reasons to dress up, dance and drink online. Due to its great importance, the Rez Day can be a time of great celebration and happiness, or a day to be rued and feared. Just like Thanksgiving and Christmas.

If a friend tells you they don't want to celebrate their Rez Day, don't believe them. What they are really saying is, "I want it to be a surprise party. A big surprise party. With lots of prims, lots of people, the hottest of DJs, and lots and lots of presents. Or Lindens."

If a friend insists vehemently that they do not want to celebrate their Rez Day, still don't believe them. Usually, clues to what they really want can be made out in how they insist. For example, "I don't want anything big" means "Please do something for Gor's sake, just don't invite people I don't know."

If your Rez Day is coming up, decorum usually states that you let your dearest friends know it is coming up. Usually at a rate of once a day in the month leading up to it, increasing to 3 to 4 times a day in the week before. This guarantees that your friends understand, just how much you really "don't want to celebrate your Rez Day", ensuring that you will have the best Rez Day ever.

Good Rez Day gifts include:

Offer to be a stripper at the party. (It costs virtually nothing but your dignity)
Writing out a notecard, telling your friend just how much you are happy they are in your virtual world (also virtually costing nothing but your time)
A Gift Card to a shopping outlet (cause you know they will just return the gift you got them anyway)
A Gift Card to a date with you (It's cute...again costing nothing but your dignity...or if they accept, the cost of the date)
Lindens (Nothing says love, like virtual money)

Places -----> Chakryn Forest

2009-10-09T13:24:00.000-07:00

(This entry is the First Place winner of the September entry contest. Congratulations to Tane Daxter for putting me onto this place!

And sorry for the delay in getting up posts, but just opened a show here and its been a bit hectic, the Guide will be brimming with new entries very soon!)

In a play written over 400 years ago by a man whose name both has people arguing and students yawning to this day, a group of people decided one day to escape the evils of their civilized society and ran off to the forest. There, a girl dresses as a boy and makes a young man pretend to fall in love with her/him and many other strange and wonderful things happen.

Today, if ever you are finding yourself in a bit of an SL societal rut, there is a place to run to. And while we wouldn't necessarily advocate dressing up as the opposite gender to make the person you love fall in love with you, we definitely can say that there are many strange and wonderful things to behold and experience in Chakryn Forest.

Home to Bettina Tizzy, a well-known support of the visual arts in SL and created by Andek Howell, Chakryn Forest is a wonderland of a delight. Densely packed with trees and some of the best sculpted landscape on the grid, it is so very easy to get lost just when you need to. And for you more adventuring hitchhikers out there, Chakryn Forest has many hidden treasures to explore. Some extremely obvious like the sculpture of the Rubenesque giant beauty taking a nap by the stream and the wonderful sculpties throughout the sim. Some more subtle and designed to really make you explore the sim like the Hobbit's or Fairie's quests, or the mountain path that lead to one of the darkest caves this reporter has ever seen with a surprise at the end to make your mouth drop.

So, fellow hitchers of the hike, we splore our grid to get lost from the madness of the dreaded Real. Now you know you have a place to go left from lost and follow that star on in till morning.

Terms -----> Chat -----> Group Chat

2009-10-05T11:22:00.000-07:00

(This entry was a suggestion of Darkye Rhiadra and is the Guide's September 2nd Place Entry Suggestion Contest winner. Congratulations to Darkye!!!

We at the Guide also know that we have gone quiet lately, and we apologize for our downtime while we are waiting for a very large RL Download Patch to finish.)

The Encyclopaedia Secundus Vita describes Group Chatting as "A form of IM chatting that is shared and enabled by members of a Second Life social group." The mego-SLverse corporate conglomeration, Alternate Industries, once took it upon itself to market Group Chatting as "That fun way to keep up with all of your SL friends at once." Most SLers that agree to be interviewed about it call it "that damned window that pops up when I am in the middle of typing something very personal."

Whatever your opinion though, Group Chat can be used for good. DJs like to use it to let their fans know when they are about to get rocking. It is a great OOC dialogue tool for an RP sim when someone new doesn't know how to get their stats listed above their head. And if you have a social Group of friends who do love to chat with each other, it is a great time saver as you don't have to set up a lagging Conference Chat all the time.

Some uses that can tend annoy your fellow group mates, however, include:

Hopping on and saying "Anyone hot on right now?"
Hopping on and making a derogatory comment about someone else in the group... (See Terms -----> Griefing)
Hopping on and telling the group that your dentist just gave you a root canal and then describing the procedure in great detail. (Unless you are in a Dental Care social group... then that might be acceptable. Root canals are never fun to talk about though.)

The shortest Group Chat on record goes to Frieda1 Roddenham in the SL Knitting Bee who simply typed "." As noone knew what she meant by simply typing the period, the rest of the group simply decided that Frieda had been drinking a little too much Bombay Sapphire while working on a scarf and left the chat at that.

The longest Group Chat on record goes to Dwezil Rachnoid who spent two full hours writing a dissertation in Group Chat about the art of mosh pit dancing at a couple's dance sim. Unfortunately, the only other person in the group that could have read his manifesto was his alt. His alt could not be reached to comment on his impressions of the work.

People -----> Luxe Helendale

2009-09-28T07:49:00.000-07:00

Luxe (pronounced Luck-see) Helendale is an artistic beauty known for her classically ecclectic fashion style. Co-founder of the fashion blog, Pluxie and currently running Luxeurious, Luxe can be found throughout the grid finding stores rarely explored, putting together looks that will have all cams perving to her.

If she likes you, you will know because she will playfully bump into you. And if she really likes you, you might get to go dancing with her at Bogart's, where she will amaze you with her ability to make it look easy while letting you lead. This is not an easy feat. Especially if your avatar has the dancing grace of an elephant on vicodin. If you are lucky enough to get a dancing date with Luxe at Bogart's, make sure to give yourself a couple of minutes buffer as she has to make sure she has just the right look. And also, while Bogart's is one of the best couples dance spots around, it takes a while to rez. But believe us at the Guide when we say that it will be worth the wait.

If you are really lucky, she will voice chat with you. Her sultry tones will make anyone melt like a pound of butter in a Paula Deen recipe. It has been suggested to her that she DJ as she has the voice, the fun, and just the right dash of innuendo to make any listener stay locked. And she has a wicked indie mix. All attempts at this have been unsuccessful so far. But the hope lives.

If you ever run into her, ask her about her art. She has been known to provide some to her closest friends to be hung in their private residences. Tell her it's your birthday or rez day. That has been known to work.

But mostly, Luxe Helendale is a wonderful woman who knows how to splore the grid, find the fun out of the most bleak landscape, and always knows just the right hairstyle to do it in. Say hi, you won't be disappointed.

RL Download Patch 1.0.4 ("Terms -----> RL: The Commentary")

2009-09-25T08:59:00.000-07:00

It's a complete love/hate relationship with your imagination sometimes, isn't it?

This blog is sort of a fun way to both celebrate my time in SL as well as let me just write in freestyle. It gets me exploring, learning more about my friends, and just having a good time. I don't really have a scheduled plan of what I am going to write about on any given day, except for those ideas suggested to me from all of the wonderful people who read the blog and talk to me inworld. No, it usually just involves me sitting down at the computer on a break, spinning the big wheel in my mind and seeing what it lands on. Then, over the day, I just let loose. Sometimes, I walk away shaking my head and going, I know that could have been better. Sometimes, I walk away with a spring in my step thinking I hit it just right. But, I always walk away feeling like I finished it. That is, until 2 days ago.

The 'Terms -----> RL' idea came when I was doing my regular morning of blog following and read Rocky's In-World and Out blog. His entry that day was 'How REAL is your Second Life?' And immediately, my imagination went into hyperdrive. A Guide entry on RL that could playfully try to answer that question. So, I sat down on my break and started to type.

Now, I know that my entries can be Dickensian chapters at times. To play off the Emperor in Amadeus, sometimes I simply have just too many words. So, as I got into the different degrees of how we let our RL into our SL, I realized that this entry was gonna get REALLY hefty. And if I think it's gonna get hefty, then I know that we gots a major issue on length. So, I decided to turn it into a 2 parter, and put the playful focus on those people who really let SL and RL intermingle. Part 2 came up the next day. I sat down to write it... got past the Kanye West joke (too easy I know, but hey... when the bullseye is larger than a mile wide, sometimes you have to shoot)... and then I got snagged.

SL/RL intermingling happens with good and bad results. I have let it happen to me. Made some great RL friends and acquaintances and have been burned a bit also. So, as I started to work out the rest of the entry, I realized that maybe a playful attitude was not necessarily one to take. And left with the choice, I suddenly saw the entry go more serious. In an alternate universe, btw, I am sure that I made the choice to stay playful and wrapped up a blog to make SLers giggle. But I only got this one to deal with, and as I got to the end of Part 2, I realized that the whole concept of RL to SL was much larger than a Guide entry or two was going to cover. And man, looking back, when did I get so serious about it? I was sitting at the last paragraph of the entry and going, "Well, then. Keep going. But for the love of all things holy, get back to the light side of it!" And on a whim, I typed in the Part 3 line.

And as a side note, I was chatting with Rocky last night and he happened to mention that Part 2 felt heavier to him too. He is an awesome and caring guy in his support and honesty. Definitely got to do a Guide entry on him soon.

Part 3 is coming. And I promise I will get back to the lighter side of it. I might even find a way to make fun of my serializing, by making sub parts to parts. But, just wanted to let you know, should you be following, that I am going to take a step back from it and let it bake a bit. In the meantime, I am gonna play with a couple of other Guide entry ideas up to the announcement of the Contest winners on the 28th, 29th, and 30th.

I am sure that RL can wait in the meantime.

Stay hoopy!

Terms -----> RL: Part 2 ("Multiversing the Metaverse")

2009-09-24T13:30:00.000-07:00

It has been hypothesized that we exist in not just one universe, but in an infinite amount of them, called the Multiverse. In this granddaddy of dimensional space, it is theorized that we actually exist in multiple versions with each universe based on a different outcome of any given variable. For example... In one universe, Kanye West interrupts Taylor Swift's acceptance speech to praise Beyonce, and in another universe running right along side this one, he interrupts Taylor Swift's acceptance speech to praise Weird Al Yankovic. You can understand the concept if you ever saw Sliding Doors, Sliders, or that really cool classic episode of Star Trek where they materialize on the "evil" Enterprise.

Of course, if you are a hitchhiker in SL, you understand this concept beautifully. After all, SL is an alternate universe of sorts, allowing you to explore other possibilities otherwise not explored in your RL. And we have explored how some SL citizens co-exist in both universes.

For some SLers, however, both SL and RL slowly begin to meld together into one, and it can become difficult to tell where one ends and the other begins. A really good day in one becomes dependent on the other. RL names and SL names become intertwined in chat conversations, and voice chat conversations, and mobile phone calls. In many ways this can be a good thing. Many good RL friendships--and yes, even relationships--have blossomed from a chance encounter in the SL metaverse. And in many ways it has not turned out so well.

Allowing both your SL and RL to merge requires some care and some caution, and it's not for everyone. And perhaps most importantly, you should have a relaxed sense of adventure at the prospect of making part of your SL experience into a RL one. Just remember the following caveats. Relative Time isn't the same in either universe, and things move slower in RL (see Terms -----> Time). Neither are the physics or geography. Sure, you can fly to meet up with some SL friends in RL, but it requires a plane and some cash. And never forget, you truly are entering into an alternate universe. Sure, there are good chances are you aren't going to run into the evil Captain Kirk, if you meet a fellow SLer in RL. But the person you meet is not exactly the avi that you have come to know, either. A good heart, an open mind, and a complete lack of expectation will get you through everytime.

Next: Part 3 ("FAQs to Border Crossing")

Terms ----> RL: Part 1 ("What is real anyway?")

2009-09-23T14:18:00.000-07:00

(The following entry comes from an idea started when I read Rocky Constantine's blog today. He is a great guy with a cool blog. You should check it out.)

That highly respected online tome of knowledge, Wikipedia, refers to RL (a.k.a. Real Life), as:
"In an online setting, "real life" refers to life in the real world. It is generally used in reference to life or consensus reality, in contrast to an environment seen as fiction or fantasy, such as the Internet, virtual reality, dreams, novels, or movies."

The problem here is this: since the dawn of history, mankind can't come to a consensus of what reality is. And not for lack of trying. We have come up with such gems as "I think, therefore I am." "Do unto others as you would have them do unto you." "S**t happens." And there was this one thing about RL being a shadow puppet show on a cave wall--what kind of hemlock were those Ancient Greeks drinking?

But whatever your reality is to you as an SL hitchhiker, RL is definitely that thing you are trying to step away from for 1 to 23 hours/1 to 7 days a week. Some other people in RL think that this is sad.

Some other people do drugs to step away from RL. And still others listen to Rush Limbaugh, Glenn Beck, and Bill O'Reilly. Sad is relative.

But the big question many SLers ruminate, debate and postulate on almost every day is this... Just where is the damned boundary between RL and SL?

For some, there is a distinct line between the two and never should be crossed. Reasons for this can range from the simple "This is my escape and I don't want to let my RL into it," to the more complex "So? I'm a strapping hetero male who likes pretending to be a female and pick up other strapping hetero males. This is my escape and I don't want to let my RL into it," and beyond.

For others, the line can get blurred on a relatively day-to-day level. A bad day in RL can be easily remedied by going to SL and complaining about it to all of your friends. Or a hot night in SL can easily have one walking around at work the next day with a spring to their step and a devilish whistle passing their lips. Here, the overlap of one to the other remains pretty narrow as one's specific personal information stays contained in one or the other. The bad RL day is kept to generalities as you only really wanted to gripe anyway. And the really hot SL night is kept back in your cerebral cortex as you don't really want your co-workers to find out that you are THAT kinky.

Then for others, the distinction between SL and RL is not really so much a boundary as it is a metaphysical theory.

But that is for Part 2.

Terms -----> Greedy ("It's like Yahtzee... But so not.")

2009-09-21T09:34:00.000-07:00

As mentioned before, much has been argued on whether SL is a game or a lifestyle (see Terms----->Griefing). But one thing can be agreed on, there are games to play in SL. Many, many games. Games of skill, of chance, ...of keeping a HUD up and running at all times so that you can get more gold pieces.

One such game that pulls on the addictive strings of many SLer's endorphin rushes and makes for a great social time with friends is Greedy. It is also known as Greedy Greedy, but many citizens feel that the effort to type the same word twice is just another step toward Carpel Tunnel, so you are more than likely to just hear it called Greedy... as in "Hey u, u wanna go play some Greedy 2nite? :-D" Some others just call it, "that sonofa*(&%in' game!"

The rules are simple. It's the mathematical combinations in scoring that they can write tomes about.

Sit down at the table. When it is your turn, click roll. 6 dice are displayed. 1's and 5's in any counts are good to save. 3's of a kind or more of other numbers are good to save. 3 pairs of numbers are good to save. And straights are good to save. You save the dice you want to keep by clicking on those dice. A score is tallied based on the dice you saved, and then you have the option to re-roll or stop.

But here, as they say, is where ze plot thickens! If you re-roll, just remember that the dice you saved are re-held, and you HAVE to get a scoring combination with the remaining dice on the re-roll. Otherwise, your turn is over and you get nothing. Now! If you do go for it and you can get all six dice saved up, then your 6 dice reset, your score is saved and you get 6 new dice on the roll to parse out combinations from.

So, when you play... "you've got to ask yourself a question. Do I feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?!" And it helps if you have Clint Eastwood's voice in your head when you do. Cause you just can't imagine Rachel Ray saying it, can you? Well maybe you can.

General rules of the table are that your first turn out, you have to get 1,000 points. No 1,000 points, you don't get on the board. This forces you to roll even when you only have 1 die left. And always makes for good stress. And there are players who spend the entire game stuck at their "first" turn. This is where the "that sonofa*(&%in' game!" term comes from.

Another general rule is to play to 10,000 points. After the first person passes 10,000 points, the rest of the table has one last turn to beat the potential winners score. Forcing most everyone to go greedy again.

We, at the Guide, must admit our ignorance--and laziness to really research--the scoring breakdown. But if you want to know more, feel free to give Karsten Rutledge's wiki page a look. It seemed to make sense when we read it.

So, you want a night in with some friends? Maybe Skype a little bit? Have a laugh? Say, "Gawdd(*&^it!!" alot? Then head on over to K.R. Engineering and get yourself a Greedy Greedy table. You will be having a ball in no time!

P.S. There have been attempts to get a "Strip" version of Greedy Greedy going to no immediate success. If any hitchhiker out there knows of one, let the Guide know. The staff is always looking for ways to be silly.

RL Download Patch 1.0.3 ("Life, the Universe, and Everything")

2009-09-18T07:39:00.000-07:00

I love it when coincidence rears its beautiful and deceptive head.

For fun, and partially to satisfy my ego's curiosity, I looked over to my profile to see how many profile views I had. Wasn't expecting much. I am still new to the blogsphere.

The counter said... 42!

For a blog that does its best to emulate the style of that truly remarkable book, this was a bit of coincidence that was both comforting and beautifully odd. I am a romantic at heart and a strong believer in Chaos Theory. At the same time, I have this nagging sense of pragmatism. So, while I know that it is just a coincidence, the inner kid in me is jumping up and down.

This next week should be another busy one for the blog. I have received alot of great suggestions for new entries and will be working like mad to research them. Remember there is a contest going for entry ideas. So if you have an SL person, place, term or just wacky cultural thing, be sure to click the contest link to the left.

In the meantime, stay hoopy!

People -----> fireboy Andel

2009-09-17T08:38:00.000-07:00

There are very few people who are not enticed by the prospect of meeting a fireman. The thought of a fireman calls to mind heroism and daring, and the humility of putting someone's life before there. For some, they are further enticed by their physique.

Then there are some who fantasies are fulfilled by meeting a theoretical physician.

But if you are more inclined to the former, then you know should know that fireboy Andel is a RL fireman. And for the reasons listed above, he is definitely worth meeting. Oh, and if it is the physique thing that really gets you going, his SL self will not disappoint as well.

In SL, he is known for his DJ voice with a southern drawl, his occassional moan upon request which has many avis typing "/passout" upon hearing, and his wicked mixes of music. He is one of those DJs who has a personal attachment to each song he plays in his line up, and is known for his ability to surprisingly dedicate just the right song for you at just the right time.

He is also known for his accidental, yet comical exploits in the metaverse. Like the time he was dancing... (yes, a fireman dancer), hit Detach All, and he dropped a very important part of his anatomy that got him the tips. He has done this many times. He is currently running for the record for the most SL crashes in a single day. He has been kicked out of Berlin. He says that it was because he wasn't wearing proper 1920s dress. But some sources say it was because he was soused on fireflies, his favorite drink, and he was running through the sim yelling, "RHUBARB!"

He is currently under the watchful and tender eye of Phinneas Vella. But his heart is completely taken and pwn'd by the very precocious Gabe Bookmite.

So, check him out. Say, "Rhubarb!" to this fine southern gentleman who cares much about those who he is close to. And very friendly to all he meets. He DJs across the grid, and will soon be DJing in Club H2O... Otherwise, if you want to run into him in his natural habitat... you will have to figure out where Gabe is first.

Guide Entry CONTEST Announcement!

2009-09-16T13:23:00.000-07:00

Hey there, all of you hikers of the hitch! The Guide is announcing it's first monthly contest!

Do you have a place, person or SL term that you think would be a great entry for the Guide? Then, let us know about it by September 23rd. Then watch the Guide for the last three days of the month when it will post entries for the top three suggestions provided by readers. Each entry winner will get special mention in their entry like only the Guide can provide... and receive LINDENS!!! 250L for the 3rd Place entry, 500L for the 2nd Place entry, and 1000L for the 1st Place entry!

Simply send a comment to this entry by September 23rd with your SL name and the following information and keep an eye on the Guide and the Prize starting September 28th!

YOUR SL NAME
NAME OF THE SIM, PERSON, OR SL TERM (Please provide links if it is a place)
SHORT DESCRIPTION OF YOUR SUGGESTION
WHY YOU THINK IT IS SO RIGHTEOUSLY HOOPY (a.k.a. Awesome, Cool... you get the picture)

Places -----> The Great Wall of China

2009-09-16T09:16:00.000-07:00

(Pictures and links will be added later this evening)

The SLverse has much to behold and experience beyond the clubs, the shopping malls and the poseballs. There are a vast range of sims dedicated to taking you places you never thought you would get to see in RL. There are entire sims capturing the essence, and sometimes time periods, of the cities of the world. Such as 1920s Berlin, where a certain fireboy Andel found himself booted for not wearing... well, let's just say the appropriate attire. But that is another entry.

And then there are those sims that capture the man made wonders of our RL world.

Such a place is The Great Wall of China. A wonderful sim that captures the rural Chinese landscape complete with a small farming community and dominated by The Great Wall itself. As fellow hitchhiker Darkye Rhiadra and this Guide reporter discovered, you might need to shorten your avi height a little if you want to walk the wall. The design is wonderful and the views amazing, but the entrances to the turrets are a bit on the smaller side. So, either set your height lower, or take some aspirin for all of the head butts into the doorway overheads.

This version of the Great Wall, unlike its RL counterpart, connects back with itself, protecting a large statue of Buddha in its encapsulated center. There are even meditation mats on which to take a knee and say an ohmmmm.

Overall, this is a great place to just take in some of the great builds in SL. A perfect little place to get away from the mainstream for a bit or take someone along to impress them on your SL worldliness. A special thanks and Golden Thumb Award go out to Ritch Nicholls for putting the Guide onto this place.

Places -----> Cream Shop ("Raindrops keep falling on my head")

2009-09-14T06:58:00.000-07:00

Do you have a clandestine meeting with your favorite illegal Sploder dealer, but are tired of finding blank open sims to meet? Do you want a little flair to your undercover encounters? A little atmospheric accent to spice up your elicit rendezvous? Or maybe you just want to crank your Radiohead, find a dilapidated apartment on a rainy city block, play some Atari and just be emo?

Cream Shop is just the right place for you. This little drenched delight is set up like a city block under a constant Low Pressure system. It's atmosphere is just dank enough to provide hours of dark fun exploring its alleys and buildings, shopping for odd knickknacks, or just plopping down and being down if you are in the mood.

But, it also has a keen bohemian feel, perfect for those moments where you want to be a free spirit against the rain gods. You can buy an umbrella and sing in the rain. Or take a special someone and act out your favorite romance in the rain movie scene. Or give yourself the opportunity to visit a city in the Pacific Northwest.

Just make sure to dodge that cab roaming the streets. It stops for noone.

Props out to Luxe Helendale and Darkye Rhiadra for introducing the Guide to the place and to bringing the reporter back when he needed a good shower.

http://slurl.com/secondlife/CREAMSHOP/217/152/21

RL Download Patch 1.0.2 Requiem for a Memorial

2009-09-11T13:58:00.000-07:00

(This post is more RL oriented with some SL reflections. Upcoming SL entries on Cream Shop, Great Wall of China, and the one and only fireboy Andel will be following in short order)

Today, I am a voice in a chorus of blogs. It is a chorus that no doubt will sing out, cry out, and scream out in many different tones, emotions and ideologies. But we are the human race. We think, therefore we are. And so, on this day when everyone who has a voice will use it, I will add mine to the Chaos Theory that is the human soul.

On a brisk Tuesday morning when I was just an actor living with a bunch of other actors, I was sleeping in. I didn't have rehearsal til noon that day and I was going to take the time to catch up on much needed sleep from the partying of my one day "actor's weekend" the day before. I don't remember exactly what woke me up that morning. I just remember already being relatively groggy and already in a waking dream state because there was some commotion in the living area outside my door. I remember my roommate shouting out to me, "Dude! A plane just flew into the twin towers on TV!"

I am not proud of my first moments that day. But in a way, I have a feeling that they, like everyone else's that morning, set up a powerful contrast to the shock and dismay that followed. I remember being pissy from being awoken by the commotion outside my door. And I remember that what was about to be revealed was so inconceivable in my mind that I actually and callously said, "What rat bastard idiot makes a mistake like that?" as I stumbled out into the living area. "Is the coffee on?", I groggily asked as I walked past my roommates gawking at the TV. I remember them arguing about what they had just seen but not really paying attention.  I just remember rattling off the "rational" possibilities of surely was a "tragic" accident of a small plane. I came back up with coffee in my hand and quickly realized that my roommates were not arguing, but were expressing shock that it was a commercial passenger airliner. I remember thinking, as I sipped my coffee and looked at the Today host in the foreground with the smoke billowing out of the tower in the background, "What are the odds of a mistake like that..." Then the second plane hit.

And to quote a man who knew how to capture your attention to a moment by making it sound trivial, "So it goes."

I confess my callousness that morning. I can only say I have done my best to change. To get through that survivor guilt of helplessness and fury. To realize the people you love don't get reminded of that enough each day, and the people who you just look on as acquaintances should be more dear.  To do my best to never forget.

I remember the days that followed. Watching a world react. Seeing such a backlash of love from all over as they sensed a pathos for a country in much need of one. Hearing tough questions in our government, in our media, in the gatherings of people. Hearing them argued, sometimes civilly, sometimes in screams. Hearing easy answers proposed that did not feel right to me. Seeing another backlash of fear and rage from those who decided the easy answers were best as they took it out on their fellow countrymen who looked different, simply cause the easy answer was someone needed to pay.

I remember the years that followed. Watching a world react. Seeing the pathos we had earned in our grief lost as we turned that grief into anger, and called it a new world order. Hearing the arguments become divisive.  Hearing fewer and fewer questions being asked, because fewer and fewer people wanted to try and tackle the answers. And those left trying to ask the questions feeling more and more alone.
And now, eight years later, as we hold our memorials and commemoratives, I look back on that day.  On the loss, on the horror. And all that has happened since. And I wonder.

There are some wonderful SL memorials and fundraisers being held.  A simple check of your group notices will no doubt reveal some to you.  I am planning on going to a few of them. But, however you spend this day, don't just think on that day.  Mourn the loss and honor the heroism, definitely. But also spend the time to think on all of the days since. Find the good or find the bad in our new history. Ask how it can be better going forward, and don't settle for an easy answer. As long as we do this, our memorials will never fade into becoming just another day on the calendar. As long as we do this, we will forever honor the close to 3,000 souls lost to us that day for generations to come.

People -----> Travie Tyles

2009-09-08T13:26:00.000-07:00

If you were lucky enough to know Travie Tyles in his early days of SL, you would remember him as the blue mohawked, bunny eared, industrial club dancer. Nowadays, his hair changes like the environment settings on default, and his ears are that of a cat's, but he is as devilishly mecurial as ever.

Travie is the partner of Carl Wilder, a man known as well for his love of building as he is known for his fear of RPing. But both are madly in love and can be found in Nevaria. Travie is currently watching over a nest of eggs that should hatch in the next century and Carl is licking his wounds from his neverending battles with the Fae Prince.

Always one for a good party, Travie has played DJ and dancer to many of the best ones around. If you can catch him, and he is as slippery as a cat who just doesn't want to be held, it is said that you will be blessed with a week of great partying. It is also said that you will walk away with a bunch of scratches.

He is a good photographer who has been known to take some great superhero pose shots. He is a zombie killer extraordinaire. He is a great lover of toast. And he has been known to take his ao off and run around like a newbie who accidentally hit the ctrl R macro and doesn't know how to turn it off.

But while Travie is a mercurial wonder, he is also a dear and loyal friend who takes delight in those he cares for. His love for Carl knows no bounds. And his love for his friends is full, unadulterated and like a laser light show. If you ever run into him, ignore his shushes and tell him the Guide said hello. Make a friend out of him, and ask him to help you with those pesky zombies. He is always up for a task.

Terms -----> Time

2009-09-04T12:50:00.000-07:00

We all know that Time in SL is relative.

First off, and this is important to all of the new hikers of the hitch out there, SL's GMT is actually PST--or PDT, depending on the time of year. So, if you are within the US, you simply have to figure out your time zone versus the Pacific time zone and do the math. But, for those fellow SL citizens abroad who do not practice Daylight Savings, you have also check where the earth is its relative orbit to determine whether to add an hour or not to the difference in zones. This also applies to a part of Indiana, but many have argued that if they can't practice Daylight savings with the rest of the US, then they are just un-American, making a portion of Indiana a rogue state. Resulting logic would make them SL citizens abroad then, also. There are others, still, who think it would just be best to create a compromise and give that portion to Indiana for one part of the year and to Ohio for the other part, thereby keeping its citizens American and both states will get to share in the casino tax revenue. Still others couldn't even find Indiana on a map and just don't care.

Time can be that confusing.

Another area of relativity in SL time is in relations between its citizens. This is best demonstrated by the following story: Two avis meet in an SL dance club. One is from Australia and just waking up. The other is in North Carolina, on vacation, and on an all-night tear of drinking fireflies and macroing that wolf howl gesture over and over again. The Australian loves that wolf howl gesture and gestures back. They start to IM. They hit it off, mostly because the North Carolinian's inhibition are down due to the fireflies, but also cause they REALLY like that wolf howl gesture. And for the next week, they meet up, howl insanely at one another... and other things... until the North Carolinian's vacation is over with. They stop seeing each other online. And soon after become legends of parted lovers howling in solitude for one another. This is because Einstein's Theory of Relativity basically reminds us that sooner or later, Time is gonna come back and kick you in the rear. Unless the North Carolinian gets a Second shift job and starts sleeping through the day.

And so that goes...

And finally Time can be considered relative in one final and crucial way. Like Einstein's cruel theory, spending time in RL away from SL is like travelling at light speed to the nearest star 28 light years away. From your perspective, only a week has passed. From everyone in SL's perspective, you have been away for 28 years. You will return only to find that your great condo overlooking the bay has disappeared because the sim was shut down, you've been evicted from some of the best SL groups for inactivity, that newb you helped get on their feet has started their own business and has forgotten all about you, and you partner has moved on, rediscovered themselves as a Neko and is talking about having kittens with some tom they met in a club. Whatever the results, don't panic. Just remember that sooner or later everyone else is going to log off for a while and is gonna go through the same sense of temporal disorientation that you have gone through.

Of course, if you drink enough fireflies, you won't give a damn about time.

Places -----> Da Vinci Gardens ("Play Myst-y for Me")

2009-08-25T06:35:00.000-07:00

If you love exploring, I mean really love checking out every nook and cranny of a sim. Leaving no prim unturned, touched, or right-clicked. If this is how you roll, then boy, is there a sim for you. As a matter of fact, as soon as you land there, you are gonna take one look around at everything rezzing and say to yourself, "Loooooocy, we got some splorin to do!"

Da Vinci Gardens is a series of islands out in the middle of a tranquil sea. The entire place looks like some brilliant mind set up a utopian society on top of the sunken Atlantis (that's right! underwater splorin), and then some unknown cataclysm happened and the entire society disappeared, leaving only the buildings. But oh what a society it must have been. Before you know it, you are thinking back to the old days when Myst rocked your world.

It is highly recommended that you start off with the bat ride. That's right, a ride on a giant bat. This will give you a beautiful aerial tour of what there is to explore above water before landing you in a cave. From there, try out the chill poseballs (leave your HUDs and attachments in your inventory cause this is a PG sim), or hop on a pontoon and go exploring the islands. Check out the castle with its secret doors and bookshelves, the many observatories, the temple ruins, the beaches, the treehouses. Go diving or fishing. Lounge and chat. Or head over to the rocketship and take off to the stars (Yes, you can really do that.)

Then, when you are ready, go under the water to explore the sunken society of Atlantis. Ride a seahorse to get yourself acquanted with all of underwater terrain. Dance like a merperson in a sunken amphitheater. Check out the Humpback!

This sim is great if you are trying to take out someone on a date, or just in the mood to get lost in new things to see. The place is popular during early SL hours, but there are good chances to go ghosttowning around 9pm SL or so. If you want to get a Myst experience, definitely head out to the Gardens around then.

This place gets 9 thumbs. It's too bad that the owner didn't open up a side sim of islands with liveable buildings like the ones on the main sim. They could make a killing in rent alone.

And 10 thumbs go out to Zeolite Roddenham. This wonderful hitcher is the one that put the Guide onto the place. If you catch her online, tell her that she definitely knows where her towel is.

People -----> Pilz Redgrave

2009-08-21T12:51:00.000-07:00

Pilz Redgrave was born a poor waif child. He has since grown up to be a SL-travelled waif, with a slightly demented giggle and a truly compassionate side that shows itself whenever he says "Heeey". His Huggles and Rawrs will always leave you with a smile.

You can always guarantee that you will always see him with a different look about him everytime you meet him. He is a lover of outfits and each one shows off his impeccable taste in choosing just the right pixels and dots to accent his fashion sense that day. He can mostly be seen wearing the stylish mod wear that makes fashion models blush. And he was known for his fashion blog with his good friend, Luxe Helendale, called Pluxie. But he can also be seen wandering SL with an impish glee in one of many humorous, but always provocative, looks.

For example... A long white haired elf sorceror who is in constant search of the "Dark Lord". He does this by tracking down the first fantasy RPer he sees and saying, "Are you the Dark Lord?" His elf seems convinced that the Dark Lord could be anyone and anywhere, much to the confusion of any poor RPer who crosses his path.

Or... A black and white Harlequin jester. He seems to like to bring this look up for those people he wants to leave with a tinge of confused androgynous desire. It usually works, too.

He can currently be found haunting the Nevaria sim, playing a Fae character with sharp teeth and a taste for blood. Dark, yes. Adorable, always.

Whatever his look, he is always a sight for sore eyes, and is always a good person to make your day with a hello. Not to mention, he can tell you where all of the great looks are. If ever you run into him, be sure to give him a Huggles and say hello.

RL Download Patch 1.0.1 -- Heartrate 153, 6.5 MPH, iPod Blaring

2009-08-17T13:54:00.001-07:00

(Another download from this thing that we call RL, another post on another sim will be coming shortly)

At lunchtime, the far left elliptical machine next to the auto-paper towel dispenser is my kingdom for 30 minutes. In the beginning, my days on the machine were an experiment in keeping my heartrate down to an acceptable level while maintaining the highest speed I could. I didn't bother trying to see if I would stop sweating as much. I could break a sweat in Siberia. No, I was just aiming at getting to a place where I really felt like I was working out and not moving at the pace of a Mock Turtle.

Each day, I program my weight, age and time into the elliptical. The machine then tells me that I have to maintain a certain heartrate. Once you get going, the machine then sends you a little digital message once you have hit your heart rate, and then starts letting you know if you need to slow down because your heart rate is getting to high. For me, 156 and above and I get the message. And in the beginning, I swear the machine was getting ready to start yelling at me to SLOW DOWN! The problem was... any slower and I wouldn't be going fast enough to get power to the machine.

It got easier, and I started getting faster and faster without sending the BPM above the machine registered danger zone. At first, it was little games I would play with my breathing. Breathe through the nose for a little bit?... Slows down your heart rate by 3... for a period. Exhaling sharply?... works great if you keep your breathing flow regular. And for awhile, I am sure that I was a sight to behold. A sweating man, pumping away at the elliptical, head down, and breathing like he is at a Lamaze class.

Then one day, a very dear person to me, looked me in the eyes tenderly and said, "Shithead, why are you making it so difficult? Bring your iPod along and stop thinking about the heartrate."

So, I brought the iPod, as you should never really argue with tough love. More oft than not, they are right 100%. And what do you know? It worked. The heartrate leveled in the right zone, and the speeds kept getting faster. I can now pump along at about 7 mph for the first 15 minutes before notching it back to 6 mph for the last 15. Soon, I will be ready to notch up the resistance.

But the great side effect of bringing the iPod is that I no longer look down, fixated on the readout. I am now looking at my gym. Truth told, I can't ever get those little monitors to work right to watch something while I cardio away. And I wouldn't if I wanted to, Spoon beats out midday programming any day. So, I watch my gym. And the people in it.

Like the older couple who come in every day dressed in what you think you would wear if you were getting ready to work on your garden. They come to the bench three yards to my left, holding hands. Then they split. One of them sits at the bench for a little bit while the other disappears. Then the first one gets up from the bench after a moment and starts to walk the track. I watch for about a lap and then I look down to the floor below.

And there is the pacer. Tank top, his own iPod on, he works out for a moment or two on one machine or free weight. Then he paces for a good song and a half. Then disappears off to another machine.

And there is the older man the other day, who had obviously been through a personal trainer session. He asks some stranger to help him catch a ball while he pivots at his waist and tosses it back and forth. The stranger happily obliges.

There is the young man with the emo hair and muscle-less right arm that swings when he walks. He walks the track and then goes downstairs to work on occassional machine.

The very attractive woman with larger hips who comes to pump along beside me every other day.

The guy who is obviously in great shape, but wears a tight long sleeve outfit beneath his school tank.

They all show up daily. We never say a word to each other, but I've noticed we all have exchanged glances. Nothing major. But enough to nod and acknowledge that we all know that we are there. Each day. Same time, same cardio/weight train channel. And with my Blitzen Trapper blaring Furr... I feel like I am in an unspoken society. Us workers of the weights. We all come together for about an hour a day and we all keep to ourselves, but we all know of each others presence. And I can't help but smile.

And then I get to my last song of the list. "Stronger," by Kanye West. A favorite of a special SL friend and a favorite of mine. And at this point I am past the cardio and I am killing some limb of my body. And I am getting to the end. I am drenched. I am tired. But, I have an inward smile. And ironically, thanks to my iPod, I stopped working on the Breathing Method and started becoming part of the club.

It's not gonna be staying up late on SL that gets me fired. It's the day I realize I love being at the gym and never wanna go back to work.

Stay Hoopy!

Terms -----> Griefing

2009-08-12T05:49:00.000-07:00

That famed and reknowned online tome of reliable information, Wikipedia, describes Griefing as:

The use or abuse of a game mechanic that was not intended by the game's developers.
The inability of the victim to exact some means of retribution beyond utilizing similar unintended game mechanics.
The intended purpose of an act of griefing must be to negatively impact the gameplay of another person.

In SL, citizens are somewhat divided into whether or not they are in a game or an online community experience, with bitter debates raging between both sides. And while the Helendale-Tyles Treaty of early 2007 completely broke down three days later after a star-crossed tryst between a gamer and an alternative lifer ended with the gamer submitting a chat log of the encounter to gamersloveshack.com.eu.org to win a contest for the steamiest SL chat experience, both sides can agree on this...
Griefing is fricking annoying whether you view it as a game or not.
The history of the first SL griefer dates back to the dark pioneer days when AOs were just a glint in the eye of the first programmer. It is said that it all started not too long after the first sexual encounter (see Museum of Sex Furniture entry). A certain Dwezil Bookmite oversaw the first encounter of two avatars continually walking into each other. He did not understand what he was seeing as he wasn't privy to the IM chats, and mistook it as a fight. Being frustrated at a dance club where he felt that everyone was ignoring him, he decided that it was time for revenge. He immediately tp'd to the club, set his avatar to run, and began running into anyone on the dance floor he could see. Much carnage was brought. The poor Brazilian SLers who were the patrons of the club didn't speak english. This was why they didn't reply to Dwezil's IMs of "Yo, just what the hell do I have to do to dance here. Do I click on the floor or something?" when he had originally visited the club the day before. This is also why they didn't know how to respond to his constant cries of "Snub me? BUMP YOU!" as he ran into them over and over again.
Dwezil was promptly ejected from the sim and spent another 5 days of storming other clubs and sims. He no longer bothering to try and talk to anyone, he just quietly played a game in his head of collecting points for how many people he could ram before being ejected. He quickly committed avi suicide not too long after. But, it is rumored that he has since returned in the form of multiple alts.
From that point forward though, it was difficult to put Pandora back in the box. Griefing had reared its ugly head and began to take new forms as the SLverse continued to expand and evolve. Spamming, IM insulting, local chat insulting, those gestures that spell out the form of a wolf and are accompanied by a howl, rezzing 100 BMWs on someone's sim...all these are forms of griefing. All are considered unwelcome by the vast majority of the SLverse.
Except for that wolf gesture thingie. That one seems to be popular.

Places -----> Greece ("It is the word")

2009-08-10T07:12:00.000-07:00

Many veteran SL hitchhikers are in a constant mode of SLacation. They travel from sim to sim always on the lookout for that happening dance spot, curious 1,000 prim artifact, or just downright hoopy place to pull up a pose ball and just enjoy the view. But, for the hardworking SL citizen, the idea of a SLacation is just a flitting fantasy that looms just beyond the horizon of the next complete building project, dance or DJ shift, or the next "fade to black" in a particularly arduous RP session.

Well, for those hitchhikers who haven't been there, and for those hardworking SLers who are ready to close up that edit window, there is a sim to escape to and explore.

Ever wanted to go the Acropolis? Check out the villa-like streets of Athens? Or just lounge by the Ottoman White Tower while taking in the surf of the Mediterranean? Well, if you're like the owners of the Guide, then you don't have the RL money to go there. But in SL, all of these things and the beauty and soul of Greece are just a TP away.

Greece is actually 3 sims in one and there is a lot to explore and much to get pleasantly lost in. At current count, there are two dance clubs, and a mix of shops ranging from odd freebies to high end clothing. But, happy hiker of the hitch, it ain't always about the shopping. Sometimes it's about the journey. And wow! Athens has a beautiful Mediterranean feel, complete with Acropolis, complete with great atmospheric music. They have their own police station and jail, which at the time had one resident looking like they were sleeping off too many shots of Ouzo. And if you are looking for the feel of travelling to a foreign country, there is no better reminder than realizing that you don't understand a word of the chat. So, bring your translator. Or don't, if you are up to a fun time of watching another language converted into SL speak right before your eyes (Nothing is more fun than seeing something written you don't understand followed up with ROFL).

And there is more, much much more. A welcome center provides you tp points throughout Greece and its fellow supported sims. And TP stations are located throughout the sim to help you zip from sight seeing point to sight seeing point.

So, take a date. Go during the afternoon to take in the local atmosphere and learn some Greek. Go during the evening to enjoy the place to yourself in ghosttown mode. But just go. Give yourself that much needed SLacation.

A definite 8 Thumbs out of 10. Only missing two for lack of places to lounge or rentables. Wouldn't it be great to say you had a little villa in Greece?

RL Download Patch 1.0 -- Chicago Cubs 4, Cincinnati Reds 2

2009-08-05T06:56:00.000-07:00

(Fair warning, this is not an SL entry but references it. For those hitchhikers out there not interested in the RL musings of this reporter, a new Guide entry will be up by this Friday)

I was tired. My home team was battling for last in the NL Central. And it was Monday. So, I don't really remember why I said I would go to see the Reds play the Cubs that night. I just remember that as I pulled into the parking garage after driving for an hour, that I was not looking forward to it all. A simple night at home with the kitten, my Diet Coke, and my Witch Hunter toon on Warhammer was what I was craving. And I needed to update the blog with photos and links of Nevaria.

What did keep me moving with my merry band of fellow fans as we walked our 11 plus blocks to the stadium was that the Cubs were actually in the running this year. And while my Reds were destined to lose, it would be great to say that I saw the Cubs play the year they broke their century long bad streak. Also, my dear SL friend, Kolin Wylie, is a Cubbie fan. I thought it would be fun to be able to report back that I got to see them live when I know it has got to be a bitch to get Wrigley stadium tickets this season.

And then about 2 blocks away, as my group was becoming part of the large processional of fans entering the stadium, a little game popped in my head. What if Kolin had come down to Cincy to see the game? He has blown through Cincy before and it was only 5 hours away. So, what if in the throng of 22,222 fans, he was bopping along with his friends to come see his Cubbies kick our ass. We have never met in real life, so it became a fun game of Where's Kolin when I turned the corner and saw that the Reds fan were outnumbered by the blue wearing Cubs fans.

By the time we had gotten to our seats up in the nosebleeds (I do hang out with actors, after all), my fun imaginary exercise stopped as I looked down on the field and saw that we were right behind home plate. We hadn't hit dusk yet, but the lights were already on and the diamond and outfield beamed up at us as if they were more 'there', more real. And the little whining voice in the back of my head shut up, my eyes got wide and I was like a kid again seeing a live game for the first time. I had forgotten so much. And through those nine innings, my love for the game and for those people who play and love the game came back to me.

In the first inning, people are still pouring in, getting settled, chatting it up and getting their beers and brats lined up. Some, though, are intently watching the game. Justin, our ringleader for the night, already had his playbook out and had started recording the lineups and making suggestions. He was in red, but Justin is a devoted St. Louis fan and was there rooting for the Reds out of a sense of mutual interest. The Cubs were too close to his Cards in the standings for his liking.

The Reds pitcher that night came out and you could tell immediately that he had a case of the nerves. He was restless on the mound. Tight inside pitches that were way to close for comfort. I remember thinking "Stage fright" right before my friend Rob leaned over and said, "And he is our ace pitcher."

I remember how the announcer sounded like a used car salesmen as he brightly pumped out the Reds lineup. And how he sounded like the "In a world..." movie voiceover guy as he droned out the Cubs lineup. I remember laughing like a kid when I heard Milton Bradley announced.

By the second inning, the Reds fans were already resigned as Havang let the Cubs take 3 runs off us. The Chicago fans were riled. And eventhough Havang got his groove back in the next four innings, the stadium got more and more quiet as both sides just saw the outcome as inevitable. And then came the seventh, and I went from a passive observer of the game to a fan for my Reds and the game. And I have the Cubs to thank.

Havang had gotten much better, but he was tiring out and had let a double get by him with one out in. With the Cubs big hitters coming up, Dusty had decided to call in the relief. The Cubs fans started to smell blood and had started to get riled up. The Reds start their relief pitcher off by having him walk the next hitter. Now, the Cubs fans are ticked, calling out dirty pool, while the Reds fans are getting nervous. Rob and I start explaining to some people how it isn't that bad of a strategy as it prevents one of their sluggers from hitting it out and letting the double score. We get an out on the next hitter. But then the relief proceeds to walk the next one, and now the bases are loaded with yet another high profile slugger coming up.

The place is now filled with Cubs fans cheering. We are in a pretty heavy Reds fans section, but two guys behind us are pretty confident that they are about to see some decimation take place, and begin to get loud. The rest of the tier is dead quiet, being the best sports about as we can, but bristling at what is about to come.

The slugger comes out onto the field and the stadium erupts with Cub cheers. The pitcher winds up and the cheering winds up with him. Getting louder and louder as the ball is thown... and the slugger swings at air!

All of the sudden, one roar stops and another starts as the Reds fans stand up cheering. The sound much smaller as we are so outnumbered, but all of us into trying to give back a little of what we just got.

And for two more pitches, the game came back to life. The Cubs fans getting louder and louder on the windups cause all it took was one hit. And the Reds fans actually ramping it up with them cause now they had a little hope and taking over the full blown cheer as the pitch was made, the bat was swung and nothing connected. On the third strike, and the third out with three men left on base, the stadium was alive and roaring. I realized my voice was going at the seventh inning stretch.

Now it was our turn, and we weren't disappointed. A home run right out of the gate, and for two more innings, it became a slugfest where each pitch counted, each batter's stats mattered. And the crowds for both sides became invested in how it would turn out. And in the end, we lost. I knew that Kolin was somewhere excited and that Justin was a little worried cause the Cubs had just tied up the NL Central. But it had been a good game, and while the Reds were now 13 losses out of the past 14, they didn't just lay down and take it. And they got a fairweather fan's respect.

So, Justin and I are talking about the upcoming months. Cause I know my Reds are gonna be out soon. And I know there is gonna be a showdown with the Cubs and the Cards soon. And while Justin and I were allied for a night, I am gonna be a Cubs fan as they move toward the playoffs. Cause if the Reds can't win this one, I think it would be great if the team that hasn't in about a century does. Cause Justin needs a friendly nemesis, someone to talk smack with and get the testosterone flowing. And after the other night, I do too. I think I am addicted.

The Nevaria Wonderland RP Sim (a.k.a. Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore)

2009-08-03T08:09:00.000-07:00

If you loved Alice in Wonderland, you are gonna love this sim. Here, Wonderland (a.k.a. Nevaria) is a place that has disintegrated by it's well-known madness and civil war after Alice's last adventures there. Its citizens and intruders cover all aspects of creatures, all vying for control of what remains and taking on a Court that is still haunted by the soul of a queen who began to actually follow through on her cries for "Off with their head!"

The layout is intense with a steampunk feel. This Wonderland is a world that hit the industrial age head on and is suffering from a concussion. Its dimensions play with your mind and all of the old imagery you remember from the story lies wrecked from a war of long past. You get the feeling you are in a highly disturbed child's playroom where all of the toys have been strewn about the room with the wear and tear of rough play.

The sim is RP, but like almost all RP sims, if you are an SL Hitchhiker and are all about exploring, a simple OOC Titler is available for you to let you wander unmolested. And currently the sim is not as populated with citizens day round, so you might get to explore in ghost town mode (which is creeeepier). However keep your towel handy just in case. Those Fae characters are not as nice as you would think they would be.

If you are into RP and like a warped and demented mental sandbox to play in, this place might be for you.

The options for character creation are relatively open. This is a world where alot of the old characters sacrificed themselves to its civil strife, though. So, if you are looking to step in as the March Hare or the Mock Turtle, expect to have a REALLY good story to apply with the sim owner.

The combat system, and there is combat, is all from a storyteller's perspective. They are all mad in Nevaria, but they are all about telling the story. So, no stat HUDs, just a dice roller for random chance, if you want to set your outcome. But, here, you are expected to tell your way through an encounter realistically, knowing enough about yourself, your abilities and your weaknesses to make it about the fight and not about the winning or losing.

And finally, cruelty and depravity abounds. Things might get sexual, or just downright sadistic. But here, as in most RP, it takes two or three to perform a sado-masochistic tango. It is all about what you bring to this Mad Tea Party. And where you are willing to go.

The Guide gives this sim 8 out of 10 Thumbs.

Jobs -----> Camping

2009-07-29T07:56:00.001-07:00

For the newly rezzed citizen, that leap from the Introduction Island to the wilds of the SLverse can be a daunting task.

First, there is the question of where to go.

This is quickly followed up by where do I get the money to buy my online happiness*** when I get there.

It is usually at this point that our intrepid new wanderer of the SLverse turns to the Search window and begins to look up the SL classifieds for work. Desperately afraid that they might not have any marketable skills with which to forge a new career in SL, they then stumble across an ad not much different than this:

"Hey There! Looking to make some quick lindens, meet new friends, and have a great time in one of the hottest spots in SL?!!! Well, look no further. We here at Alternative Industries are looking for a person to take up a position in their force to market one of their sims, and need new, energetic people like yourself. No SL experience necessary! Come by today and learn about the marvels of camping! You can earn as much as 10L/hr!!!"

"Oh! 10L an hour!!" says our new adventurer, completely lacking in the street smarts of the Third World inflationary design of the SL economy, and promptly poofs off to his new career in a cloud of wide-eyed smoke.

What happens next can best be described in testimonials from some of the more jaded ex-campers:

Alden Glenfadden is currently hanging out in the Dublin sim, panhandling for his next Guiness--no one has the heart to tell him that it is free and copy/transfer. He tells the Guide: "When I got there, I was so happy to see so many people like me. I remember sitting down on a 2L per 17 minute bench with two other avis. I remember feeling so warm inside. Like when you down a Jameson on a cold winter's night. Boy, did that not last for long. No one would talk to me, and I crashed right before I got my first 2L cause the sim was overcrowded. When I logged back in, someone had taken my feckin spot."

Dudette19223 Andel is currently a model for a well known freebie fashion store making commission from the sales. She tells the Guide: "I was like WTF, u no? I sat there for 2 hours, made 12L, got hit on by a bunch of pervs. Watched some guy with a free penis walking around with it attached to the wrong part of his body. So, I just went downstairs to watch the Rock of Love marathon on VH1. Took me 3 months of just sitting there, logged in, but I finally got enough to get a cool pair of shoes!"

IMs to the CEO of Alternative Industries, Botman Paine, were not returned. And a visit to the Alternative Industries headquarters, turned up nothing but an auto notecard giver providing a notecard with the following: "Dwezil Rachnoid wuz here!!!!"

The current whereabouts of Dwezil Rachnoid are unknown.

***Happiness in SL, some have argued, is completely a figment of the imagination in the mind of the consumer. Just like Real Life.

Places -----> The Museum of Sex Furniture

2009-07-27T11:19:00.000-07:00

The stories of the origins of sex in the SLverse abound.

One story goes that in the dark days of the Beta trials, a certain Imahorny Daxter looked across a beachlike sim and saw another avi named Deirdre280 Capalini enjoying the solid azure sky without the restriction of any clothes. At the sight of Deirdre280's doll-like body and beautiful helmet of hair, the blood rushed straight from Imahorny's Real Life pizza-filled stomach to other, more vital, organs. And in one IM to Deirdre, sexual relations in SL was born.

The message read, "Hey u, u look hot, wanna see what these things can do?"

Now, there are many versions of this tale with details ranging from the genders of the avis, to the genders of the Real Life users, to the color of the beautiful helmet of hair. But most SL historians usually write this off as unimportant. Mostly because they don't want to be reminded of the details of their first sexual SL encounter, nor the helmet of hair that first caught their eye.

What is agreed on in this Adam and Eve tale, is this. That 30 seconds after Deirdre280 consented to her admirer, the only thing they had to show for it was some badly misspelled IMs and avatars 10 meters away from each other. This was because they could only try to press their avatars into each other to physically resemble their coupling, and doing this while typing and making themselves feel good at the same time proved too difficult an action to sustain. Thus, 45 seconds after the first coupling, the concept of the animated poseball was born when Deirdre280 IM'd her new friend, "WTF, there has to be a better way to do that, dude."

Whatever the origin story, the evolution of the sexual position poseball has been quite fast. And millions of residents today can happily sit back with one hand free to enjoy the vision of themselves coupled with another consenting adult avi in a multitude of different environments and positions...

after some positional adjustment, of course. Because one thing that can really ruin a moment, is perv camming in on a close up to see something not going where it supposed to be going.

And now, we have a place dedicated to the history of it all!

That's right, the SL Museum of Sex Furniture (http://slurl.com/secondlife/Uxert/232/245/67) on Zindra has been created to satisfy that naughty historian in you. To show you just how far the SLverse has come, from the days of one position repetitives to flexibles to those items for people into tentacles. Brought to you by the wonderfully wicked minds of Eddi Haskell and Jago Constantine, you can experience an integral part of SL history with a true hands-on approach. And most importantly, hands-free.

Much of what is apocryphal...

2009-07-25T16:46:00.000-07:00

The SLverse is big. Really big. I mean, I can't even begin to tell you just how mind-boggling huge it really is. There is much to see, people to meet, places to hang out. There are wilds to navigate, urban landscapes to wander, and shopping to be done everywhere! There are dangers. There are excitements. There are poseballs. If you need to stimulate yourself mind, body, or soul, there is something for you.

Here at the Hitchhiker's Guide to the SLverse, I want to provide you with much of what you need to know to be able to travel the wilds of the grid, and hope to protect you from the hours of teleporting to sim after sim in the search for whatever it is you are searching for. Whether I am providing you entries on sims, shopping, or stories of SL events or just fun stories... my goal is to always keep you entertained and excited about being a Hitchhiker of the SLverse.

Always feel free to let me know if you have a place you would like to know more about, people you think deserve some coverage, or events that mean much to you. And if you are interested in offering up some of your own coverage, twirl up your towel and snap it in my direction. Would love to offer up some posts from other roving reporters in the grid.

I will post the Guide's first official entry tomorrow. In the meantime, stay hoopy!

Brendan Tsarchon